DIY Life Coach

New Year, New You?

January, done. February, done. Cheers you!

Building on our conversation for February, remember process not just outcome when you are creating goals. Questions that are coming up among 2021 students.

Frustration is a sign that you can't do this?

COMPLETELY FALSE. "Frustration" is the feeling we get when our vision for reality is different than our ability to make our vision happen. In the case of learning a new skill, it's the feeling that comes with breaking out of old patterns and creating new ones. It's inescapable. It's part OF the learning process, not a sign that you're not learning. Usually, if you rest after a bout of frustration, your brain/body will sort out the glitch and the next time you try whatever it was you were doing, you'll have gotten a bit better.

You should experiment?

TOTALLY TRUE. There's no "perfect". There's always more to discover. Explore. Experiment. See what works for you (and one of the best ways to see what works is discovering what does not work). Experiment with things you can monitor and measure: physical skills, living arrangements, working arrangements, peer groups, bedtimes, etc. If there's a way to measure the result of a test, test it.

You should have fun?

100%, COMPLETELY, TOTALLY TRUE. Find joy in the process of the DOING, not even joy OF the thing or joy in the result of the thing. Life is too short to stay miserable.

If you were a runner, the joy in the doing of the thing is the joy in process of running, not the "runner high", racing, or the solitude of country roads, focus on finding joy in the act of running. You can enjoy that act of running anytime, anywhere. Your joy would not be limited to achieving a best time or certain heart rate or winning a race. Those goals are fleeting. Joy in the act of (the process) running does not depend on you having your best day.

Outcome goals don’t last. Process goals do.

When you focus on process, the path is mastery. If you only focus on the goal - six pack abs, an accolade from RAS, you will have peaks and valleys of productivity. You will operate on luck and whim. You will be driven by external guides. You will have less control of your outcomes.

Remember to focus on the process of the thing - the daily writing, the daily hike, the monthly report, and you find a way to enjoy the process of the discovery of the thing, you will find fulfillment in the thing. You will enjoy your days. Now. (Almost) Everyday. Enjoy the process of running. Enjoy the process of creating the monthly investor reports.

Don’t put off your enjoyment for some mythical future; it leaves you unfulfilled. Focus on enjoying the process to enjoy now.

Other Things You May Enjoy


You have a plan. You're executing your plan. But things just aren't clicking ....

It may be time for a coach to help you get to the next stage. This is not a time for hoping willpower or stubbornness can carry you through. It is time for finesse.

And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.

Haruki Murakami, “Kafka on the Shore”

Read about Acorns

Money Thoughts

What is Money Laundering to you? Money Laundering is associated with sketchy people doing sketchy things ... but a finer read on the law puts all sorts of ordinary transactions at risk. Are you involved with Money Laundering ??

I want to hear your perspective. Hit reply to vent.

Happy Life Thoughts

To-do lists.

You know what's scary? To-do lists. They can start off as having so much potential, but end up being the bane of your existence. Take a look at a few ideas on how to NOT make your to-do lists living torture..

ToDos ToDone
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You've made it to the end. The blue button, "Current Business News" is the stuff I consider interesting that gets marked every few days. It's a little Finance heavy, but there's plenty of Science, Literature and assorted. You are on your own to find kitten videos.

See you in a month! -Kate
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